A Farewell to Bali

Monday, 4.4
Oh that’s so classy, you middle-aged white people stumbling down the narrow, unkempt sidewalk: cigarettes hanging loosely from your lips as you grip bottles of booze and laugh coarsely, in your ignorance, in your dumb short-sighted reckoning that serves you well in your eat-drink-be merry philosophies. Your paunches are hanging out, your eyes are dark and tired, your feet are sandy and your necks are burned. The natives scorn you when you’re not looking, and when you glance their way they beg you to buy something from them, anything: rides on the backs of their motors, bracelets “hand crafted” in China, the world’s fastest “thirty minute” massages, penis-shaped wooden key chains; and you are drunk enough and reckless enough and pretentiously luxurious enough to buy them. The sunset glints on the water: probably the strongest the sun has shone all day. This beach is dirty; overrun by dirty people, filled with dirty trash. Mini Mart, the bastion of somewhat cheap snacks and drinks, free wifi which may or may not work at any given time, and sunset-driven oldies tunes on the front porch, is a comforting refuge which the overpopulating Aussies actually seem to shun.
---
“Massage, darling?” The girls chime, thrusting a wrinkled yellow pamphlet into my resisting hands. “Sorry, I already got one,” I responded truthfully. I had indeed, a few steps down the road, a few minutes previously. “Manicure?” they asked, not to be deterred. I declined, laughing, and waved as I continued to walk.

“Lady, massage? Mani-cue? Massage, lady?” A few steps further on, another duo thrust a pink pamphlet toward me. I refused and continued on, comfortable with the daily drill of trying to take even a brief walk in Kuta, Bali. All the locals are trying to make a living off the hoards of tourists and surfers who come to utilize Indonesia’s sun and waves, but despite the large amounts of money pouring into the country, locals remain adamantly and self-proclaimed poor.

Entrepreneurship and microfinance are bastions of small success and the improvement in local economies worldwide, and have been hailed as achievements in reducing the global poverty gap. But these small businesses need actual entrepreneurship. Entrepreneurship is defined as the creativity of innovative business models, generally beginning at a grassroots level and working into exponentially successful enterprises.

Microfinance in and of itself is not enough; it needs to be diversified. Instead of selling the same cheap lighters and Tshirts and massages for forty shops in a row and annoying tourists to the point of NO SALES, I have a few suggestions for the Indonesian business people. With their motivation and persistence, they could certainly succeed, given a few good business tips from this non-Business major.

1. DIVERSIFY. The key to good business is standing out and offering an attractive product or service that people will actually buy. Know the market and brainstorm creative ideas on how to attract customers who cannot get your product elsewhere, or at least close by. This is like, highschool econ, here. Or for some, common sense. Since all 39 of your neighbors on the block are already selling “Bintang” beer tank tops, but no one is selling USB movies, despite every other surfer dude who comes up and asks where he can obtain them, why don’t you invest in getting some movies on USB? A novel idea. Or, since all other 876253 travel agent stations sell the same rides to various points of the island, but NO ONE goes to ----, the important ferry point for budget travelers hopping off to nearby Java Island, why don’t you revamp your “transport” and be a little flexible for travelers. Just because your 85 taxi friends don’t do it, it doesn’t mean it’s a bad idea.

2. Don’t assume that people sleeping on the beach are going to happily wake up and buy your ice cream just because you’re shouting it at them. Be discreet salespeople: proactive, yet tactful. Learn to read expressions and use persuasive means (ie, reapeating “lady, lady, lady” or “buy something? Yes? Yes? Yes?” doesn’t necessarily equal a sale. In fact, it has observably sometimes resulted in a kick of sand to the face.

3. “Darling” doesn’t always work for a young girl trying to make a massage sale to another young girl. Use appropriate language and don’t stand on the street like a hooker if that’s not what you’re selling.

4. Have I mentioned, DIVERSIFY ?

If I really stopped to re-read what I wrote, I'm sure I'd be horrified. Perhaps you can point out the obvious errors; I'd be happy to discuss this topic at greater length and depth.